Okay so you think you’ve found your perfect girl. She’s cute, she’s funny and she’s an all around fun person to be with. You have a blast when you’re hanging out with her and every time you part ways, you’re left wanting more. But there’s just one thing standing between you and blissful harmony, she won’t go out with you. Now you’re left wondering why and you’re racking your brain trying to come up wth the answer. Well we’ve done a little thinking too so let’s see what we came up with.
You’re too good of friends
How close are you guys? How long have you known each other? She might look at you as one of the few people she can be herself around and not worry about being judged. To a girl, this is everything. Especially among females, there is a lot of judgement passed. Women are always sizing themselves up to other women and acting a certain way to be socially acceptable. Now around you, there’s no need to be self conscious and she feels comfortable enough in your presence to just let go and be herself.
She just got out of a relationship
If this is true then she may not be looking to date just yet. Chances are it ended on a sour note and she may not be quite over it, or worse yet, maybe she’s not over him. If you’re hanging out with her and she randomly mentions his name or randomly bring up memories of him (a certain restaurant or song might trigger one) chances are she’s not over him. If this is the case, you want to give her some breathing space anyway. No one wants to be in a rebound relationship and you definitely don’t want to be the person she’s on the rebound with.
You have a reputation with women
When you guys are hanging out with friends, does it seem like you have a different girl on your arm from time to time? It could be your reputation precedes you. If she sees you with different girls at different times so she could be thinking to herself that she’ll end up being a flavor of the week.
She knows one of your exes
Since you guys have mutual friends, there’s a chance she knows one or some of your exes. There’s also a chance that they’ve gabbed once or twice about you. That may be a reason she’s a bit hesitant and guarded.
She’s just not that into you.
She may think you’re a great guy to hang out with but maybe on her end, the chemistry just isn’t there. There’s a big difference in hanging out with a friend and hanging out with a romantic interest. Think of it like hanging out with your sister versus hanging out with that really cute girl you see every so often at the gym. See the difference? So although you guys have a blast when you’re out and about amongst other friends, the thought of being one on one with you may not be quite what she’s looking for.
You’re party buddies
I think this is one of the most overlooked yet obvious reasons. Is she a “going out” friend? You guys are out, you’re dancing, you both have had some drinks and then you guys start getting a little flirty and touchy-feely. The night out ends and before you know it, you’re back at your place and one thing has led to another and well….you see what I’m getting at? If you guys have been known to hang out and party, she may not be taking you seriously. She could be asking herself, “What about the other girls he hangs out with?” She’s probaby thinking that she’s not the only one to have woken up in your bed so naturally there will be some uncertainty and hesitation on her part.
It can be hard to decipher the reasons why your dream girl doesn’t want to take that next step with you. The best approach is to just ask her why she doesn’t want to go out. There’s no guarantee that she’ll tell you the real reason, but at least you’re giving her the opportunity to be honest with you, and honesty is really all you can ask for.
