How many of us know of someone who’s really great but just can never seem to win at relationships?  As their friend we’re sympathetic and try to encourage them that things will get better and they’ll find their one.  But will they?  As friends are we really doing enough to help them, or are we just offering compassion as they continue their same cycles? 

In life it’s true that it’s easier to offer advice to others than it is to advise ourselves.  The simple fact that we’re not as emotionally involved in the decision (or the consequences of the decision) makes it a lot easier to think rationally.  This is a big reason why we should be more proactive in helping our friends with their relationship issues.  Now, I don’t mean we should try to set them up and play matchmaker because that can lead to some awkward situations.  But if we’re able to be completely honest with them and analyze their situations from a third-person point of view we have the opportunity to help them get out of their relationship rut and not settle for something less. 

The biggest trap that you have to prevent them from falling into is settling for the first person that expresses interest in them.  Sometimes we tend to exaggerate the positive qualities of our potential mates when we’re lonely, only to be let down in the end because we jumped into something too soon.  This can be especially true if you’re constantly around couples and you’re the only single one.  These are the types of situations that we need to be conscience of when deciding to help a friend.  If you’re not able to relate and see things from their point of view, all you’ll do is push them away. 

The hardest part of trying to help a friend with their relationship issues is that you never want to seem overbearing or pushy.  When dealing with emotions, it can be a very delicate thing, and the last thing you want to do is alienate your friend and put a stress on your relationship with them.  The key is being honest without being insensitive to their situation and needs.  A true friend will tell them the truth, but make sure you do it in a way that is not condescending or rude.  If you’re happy in your relationship, don’t think that it will be so easy for everyone else.  When it comes to finding someone we all have our own personal journey to go through.  The last thing you want to do is to make them feel inferior, as they’re already going through a tough personal time.

The good news is, if you are able to help them see things from a rational point of view and become a positive part of their emotional development, it’s a win-win situation.  They get to grow and hopefully build more positive relationships in their lives, while you are the friend that cared enough to help them through it.  It brings you closer together with them, and allows you to contribute to your own friend’s happiness.  In life we all have different strengths and weaknesses, being able to learn from each other is the best way to help each other improve.