Proposing to my wife was one of the most exciting and nerve-racking times of my life. When it comes to something so big, you really want everything to go perfect. It’s funny in that sense, because looking back on it now the imperfections in our experience are the ones we look back at and smile the most about. They’re the reason our story is worth telling actually. No matter how hard you try to get everything just right, there will always be something that doesn’t go according to your plan. That’s life, and that’s love…at some point you just have to enjoy the ride! Anyway, the story of how I proposed to my wife is a pretty funny one, but she is my wife, so I guess you can say it went well after all.
My wife and I had only been together for about 11 months when I decided to pop the question. That’s really not that long of a time, but I think we both new that we had found the person we wanted to spend our lives with. I had been thinking about different ways to do it, trying to come up with something that was meaningful to us and also something that she’d never forget! Our first date was playing mini-golf and I almost decided to propose there on the 18th hole! Kind of cheesy, but she still would have loved it (feel free to steal if you have a special bond with mini-golf as well). In the end I decided on a weekend away at a beach resort about 3 hours away from where we live. I thought it would be a great idea because it would have been our first whole weekend away with just us (she had a young son that was always with us), and if I proposed on Friday we could spend the whole weekend as an engaged couple. The plan was set, all I had to now was execute.
Her family is very old-fashioned, so I made sure to do everything by the book. I told my parents first, and they approved. Then I made sure to ask her parents for their blessing. They invited me over to their house and we talked about everything. In the end, they gave me their blessing as well. Her parents also agreed to watch her son (our son now!) for the weekend. All the while, my wife didn’t know a thing! I had already ordered the engagement ring about a month back, and it was beautiful. We had gone out and looked at rings already, so I knew what she liked. It takes a lot of planning to do all this, so do your homework!
When trying to make the reservations, I had to include my wife in the conversation because I needed her to be able to take off work to make it all happen. I thought she’d be so excited to go that it wouldn’t be an issue. Well, I was wrong. She had never been away from her son for more than one night (the night of our Valentine’s Day date/fiasco, but more on that some other time), and the thought of being away from him for a whole weekend was hard for her. I kept pushing her to go (obviously since I did all the planning and I was trying to propose!) and eventually she agreed…after a long argument and a now classic “why does it have to be now or never” speech. She laughs at it now, but I still give her a hard time about trying to postpone our trip not knowing I was trying to propose.
I had planned to propose on the beach at sunset when we got down there. Perfect, right? Well, we got kind of a late start so I wasn’t sure if we would make it there before nighttime. It turns out that I was right, so the sunset part was out. I decided to fall back onto plan B. I’d still propose on the beach, but I would do it at midnight. Once midnight hit, it would be our anniversary of being together (crazy kids) and women just really like when guys remember that kind of stuff. So, we went to a local restaurant to get dinner, ate, and just relaxed for a little bit. I told my wife that we should walk on the beach at midnight and she groaned a little. She was tired from working most of the day and wasn’t sure she wanted to! Again I had to convince her to go (and again I still give her a hard time about this), but eventually we went. By the way, in the middle of all this I had to find a way to slyly get the ring out and put it in my pocket which is no easy feat sometimes!
We get down to the beach and it’s pitch black and windy, not exactly the way you picture it in your mind. But I did my speech about how much I love her and how much she means to me…then I dropped to one knee and asked her to marry me. I was pretty sure she said yes (although the wind made it hard to hear), and we started hugging and kissing. It was a special moment followed by a bunch of funny ones, starting with my wife saying “can we go over in the light now so I can see?” Here I was spending months to plan, and when it came to actually popping the question, we ended up on a cold, windy beach with no lights. Classic. The funny part is, I wouldn’t change a thing. What makes my relationship with my wife special is that we can be total goofballs with each other, and it works for us.
To this day we love telling this story because of all the things that went wrong. If it was up to her we wouldn’t have even went! It all worked out for the best though, and I got my girl. That’s just proof that a little bit of imperfection goes a long way to making lasting memories. Love rarely does what you want it to do, but it somehow works itself out in the end. The best we can do is just put ourselves out there and hold on for the ride. If you’re planning to propose soon, good luck! I hope it goes as imperfect for you as it did for us.
