Every man hates to hear those few little words that are a sure sign of trouble: “Honey, does this make me look fat?” There is a fine line between being the man of her dreams and being the certified enemy. So what should you do if your woman asks you this question? If running and hiding is not an option, you need to make sure your words carefully. You have to understand the underlying question that lies behind the question. Confused yet? Welcome to the club that includes just about every other man in the world. Truthfully though, once you know why she’s asks you that, it will become painfully apparent how to react.

First of all, I disagree with the notion that you should always blindly say “no way honey” when your woman asks you. The reason being, you want to still maintain some credibility with her as a man that will tell her the truth. She’s not blind or naive. She knows she’s probably been gaining a few pounds here and there and she knows that you’ve noticed. By completely ignoring the obvious and blindly telling her that she hasn’t, it actually will do you more harm than good in the long run. Sure, at first she’ll think it’s cute and say “oh you’re sweet,” but after a while she’ll probably start to wonder if you’re really paying attention to her at all. Even worse, she may even start thinking about what else you try to lie to her about and this becomes a much bigger issue than it already is. While it may seem to be the surefire way to stay out of trouble, sooner or later you’ll have to be able to stand up and talk to her about it.

So what should you say to her if she asks you? The reason your woman asks you that is because she’s feeling a little insecure about herself for whatever reason. Maybe she has gained a little weight and those pants don’t fit as well as they used to. Maybe she noticed a few wrinkles in the mirror, or talking with her mother earlier in the day didn’t make her feel so good about herself. Whatever the reason, she’s looking for a pick me up from someone she cares about. I know what you’re saying, if she wants a pick me up why not just blindly say “no?” Well, because she wants a compliment, but not a fake one. Saying something like “baby all I know is that you’re hot to me and I love you regardless” helps to make your woman feel better about herself and appreciate your attitude towards her. It’s also a personalized response that makes her feel better about herself then just a blind “no.”

In the end, showing your woman how you really feel about her whenever she asks how she looks is the key to making it a positive experience for both of you. She doesn’t really care if you think she’s fat, she just wants to know that you still feel attracted to her even when she doesn’t feel all that good about herself. Men and women handle issues with self-confidence in different ways, so you have to make sure you understand it from her point of view. Otherwise, you set yourself up for a little thing getting blown out of proportion and causing you a lot of pain.